it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
