I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
