There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
