Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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