I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
