Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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