I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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