I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
