Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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