If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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