Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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