You're my little dorito
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
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