You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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