Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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