I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
