Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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