i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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