I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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