The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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