the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize