Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
