Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
The best revenge is premature balding
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
