you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
