no, he came in my armpit
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
