My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
