Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
honey bunches of taint.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
