I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
operation have a gay friend backfired
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
