if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
