I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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