I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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