Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
love makes seman taste better
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
