I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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