i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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