I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
