I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
