oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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