This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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