idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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