I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
