he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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