At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
