porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I am naked and annoyed.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
