i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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