Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
