I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
