She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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