For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
