Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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