she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
