They should really pass out barf bags in church
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
